Bachelor Tips: Do not microwave pillowcases.
Posted by todd Thu, 16 Jun 2005 17:52:00 GMT
(My actual pillowcases)
Laundry has never been my specialty. I admit this.
I have every intention of switching to a wash and fold service as soon as I figure out where the Chinese laundry is around here. Unfortunately for the time being, I am on my own.... You see the result above.
Actually, this one wasn't *entirely* my idea.. but I'll get to that in a moment. First the background.
When it rains it pours, or in this case, when your bed gets covered in cat fur, you light your pillows on fire. (Somehow, my version didn't catch on as well, but feel free to use that saying.) My cat is shedding, a lot, still, and it got to the point that I was starting to get fur balls myself. Combined with the fact that I had female company coming over, and I decided it might be time for some laundry.
I'm bad at laundry.
So I washed all my sheets, pillowcases, bedspread etc... Boy was it hard to stuff all that stuff in there at once! However, I'm very persistent and eventually the washer gave up.
The DRYER on the other hand, had a real attitude problem. Oh it HELD all the things just fine, more easily than the washer in fact. The problem, in my obviously non-dryer-educated opinion, was that the stuff didn't flop around like things normally do in a dryer. Like trying to shake up a snapple before you open it.
At any rate, I had more important things to do, like drink Corona with the girl, so I decided to let the dryer just work it out.
Several beers later, it was time for bed! This is where the problems began. Even as a single guy, I can't sleep on a mattress unless it has *some* form of sheet on it, so I had to go fetch the blankets from the bastard dryer.
It had managed to dry the blankets and sheet just fine, but upon inspection, my pillowcases were still somewhat damp! (Dunh duh dunh!)
In my defense, I didn't come up with the idea for what happened next... and my bachelor senses were actually tingling during the debate... which went like this:
Todd: The pillowcases are still wet.
Chelsea: Eh, just put them in the microwave.
Todd: Brilliant!
Microwave: *smoke* *smolder* *beep*
Actually, the first round went ok. I sat there and watched them spin around, and nothing funny happened. When it was done though, they were quite warm, but still damp. So I kicked it up to "re-heat", and went look out the window at the drunkards stumbling home from the bars. A big fight broke out in the street, which, being a guy, is about the best thing to see happen at 2am. So sheets be damned, get him!
Chelsea noticed the problem first.. "Uh Todd... smoke!"
Smoke indeed.
Well, nothing caught fire, my apartment only sort of smells, and I've learned a valuable lesson. Don't listen to girls, even if the idea is cool.
Any bets on how long I go without pillow cases?
Toddy, have you ever thought of actually INSPECTING the material contents of your laundry before you decide to throw it in a microwave? You know…mattresses come with that supremely available ‘NON-FLAMMABLE MATERIAL’ tag you have to rip off…but you shouldn’t assume your sheets that probably are made of polyester/cotton are the same way. Retard. See…this is why you’re such a lovable geek. :D -Carter
I was about to call you a tardo, then I remember I posted about trying to use a home brizilian wax kit.
Hey, at least you didn’t try to stick your cat in the dryer. I’m not even going to start on that story…
classic bachelor story - can’t even count how many of these I’ve heard over the years
so glad i’m a girl (one that knows better than to tell a guy to dry clothing in the microwave - attention span required)
“never let a man’s mind wander, it’s too little to go out alone”
Yes, the girl felt bad about letting me play with fire, and gave me new pillowcases the next time I saw her :)
It totally killed my bet on how long I’d go pillowcaseless.
Hmmmm…microwaving pillowcases…have you ever tried drying socks in an oven? Or gloves for that matter? That works…I’ve done it back in my days in PA. Microwaving laundry though…can’t say I have or would have tried that one.
T
Miss Trista! You are alive! (presuming this is the Trista I know)
Good to hear from ya!
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