Good Things About Being A Single Guy
Posted by todd Sun, 19 Sep 2004 22:54:38 GMT
AKA: There is something floating in my drink...Eh, Oh well.
Living alone has its disadvantages. You don't get to eat home cooked meals, as you certainly don't cook them. You don't have someone to sit around and keep you company when it's lousy weather, and.... Perhaps some tax related stuff? Really that's about it. Luckily where I live there is no lousy weather, and I can get mashed potatoes at a restaurant.
On the upside, you can get away with a type of lazy that married men only dream of being.
This is no joke, I just drank 75% of a glass of water that was full of some strange sediment resembling sea monkey powder. My theory is I somehow corrupted my ice cubes (with unfiltered water, not sea monkeys). Luckily whatever it was turned out to be heavier than water so I just continued to sit on the couch for a minute until it settled, and then drank around them. See, I'm a busy guy.. I don't have time for all this "getting up off the couch", and "pouring new water" stuff!
People who live alone also get to eat foods which are unavailable to married people, or those who have kids. Stale foods. As an example, Double Stuff Oreos are best when sqooshy. You can't *buy* them like that; you have to make them yourself. The opposite is true with Marshmallow Peeps. They are best when you could knock someone out with it. In general, if the consistency of food isn't quite to your liking, just leave the box open for a week and try again. IMPORTANT NOTE: Do not try this with wine, or any liquid other than water.
Trust me, it won't go your way.
Todd……..you are such a dork!!! That’s why I luv ya! Mom
I agree, oreos are so much better when they’re sqooshy…who wants to waste time chewing them? There’s so many more important things to do.
I agree, oreos are so much better when they’re sqooshy…who wants to waste time chewing them? There’s so many more important things to do.
This is what I’m missing by being married? Damn. Show me the way to the divorse papers.
Oreos no longer contain partially hydrogenated oils so at least you’re eating slightly healthier.
Funny. Single girls apparently eat a lot better. Came home and barbecued a rib eye. Wouldn’t have minded some Oreos however.
Then clearly you and I need to get together and eat some Oreo’s and Rib Eye!
I’m in the same situation as you- my girlfriend is far away- i’m one in the house for 4 months- as you said good things mixed up with bad things. The main thing i miss my girl’s meals :(
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